Feeling Thoughtful..

The change of song is to suit my mood tat im in now, n its also from the movie P.S I Love You.. its called LOVE YOU TILL THE END by THE POGUES.

I've been re-reading one of my favourite love novels recently, its called PS I LOVE YOU written by Cecilia Ahern.

i read it a while ago n just remembered how much i loved it! so i have been reading it again n wow! Ok so i've cried from reading a book before, definately, but i have never in my 19years of living, cried this much from reading a book! N its not just 1 or 2 times, i cry everytime and everyday tat i read it (read it slow for 1 1/2 weeks!)...

This novel, set in IRELAND, tells the story of how, Holly Kennedy, who's husband/life partner/best friend & soul mate had just passed away from a brain tumor, goes on with life.. It tells of how she struggles everyday wit her grief and how she tries to carry on with her life and how her family and friends help her out... One day, she receives a package from her dead husband, Gerry, and finds tat he had made her a LIST of THINGS TO DO, before he died and there are 10 notes in there, 1 for every month!

She basically does wtv it is her husband had told her to do, and by doing so, she discovers things about herself and learns how to take care and still LIVE.. but thru out the book, u'll see (and feel) how much of pain and suffering she's goin thru... made me think about alot of things i guess.. wtv it is, this book is definitely.. amazing! Dont worry! its not full of sadness, there are ups and laughter too! and, EVEN GUYS WILL LOVE THIS BOOK!!!! Mal (and i know he'll kill me when he reads this!!) read this book and loves it! he cried too! haha! i love him!

So they adapted this book into a movie starring Hilary Swank as Holly, and Gerald Butler as Gerry. i just finished watchin it and im.. i dunno.. ok the movie is VERY VERY different from the book, many parts are changed and really different la... im dissapointed, very! but, nonetheless, if u had never read the book, it'll be a nice movie, u know wat i mean? i enjoyed it tho! i just still prefer the book!

I think a reason why I've been crying practically everynite as i read this book was bcoz, i just felt so sad for her and i kept picturing myself as Holly and.. i.. i cant imagine goin thru wat she does.. i dunno wat id ever do if i were to lose Mal.. esp if we'd been together for 15 years n married n he suddenly he starts dying.. and then dies.. I did have a dream of tat happenin once, n i've never felt pain as bad as that before.. even tho it was just a dream, it had all felt so real, and so intense, i just dont know how some ppl deal with that..

I salute those who can deal with losing a loved one.. How they ever manage to cope wit the pain (even tho its emotional, it feels physical), and how they manage to carry on wit their lives.. i think we take our loved ones and life for granted.. i dont think i'll even be tat strong or tat brave... haha, me and Mal always argue bout who is gonna die 1st and we both wanna die 1st! ( I DONT CARE MAL!! I AM GONNA DIE FIRST!!) we just dont ever want to live life without the other.. its quite a funny arguement tho! Trisha witnessed it, ask her! lol!

So im sorry for the morbid post, ive just been thinkin about it alot.. Death.. it happens and i know its natural... but it sucks!! i feel bad.. i sometimes hear bout a person dying who im not close to, and even tho i do feel sorry for the loved ones of tat person, i dont think much bout it, u know? like i just brush it off.. but now i think bout it, SOMEONE had just lost their everything/their soul mate/their partner/their lover/their world... and i shudder to think that that might be me too one day... :S

oh well i guess these are just one of those things tat we cant help, rite? just thought id share.. i honestly hope that you'd read the book.. its amazing and gives you a whole different perspective, u know? the movie is.. worth a watch too! but just bear in mind tat its different from the book, k?

Ill be posting up pics from my KL tour thingy next! Till then, think bout wat i said!

P.S- i love you.....

*BUNNY*